Chapter 181: This Was Goodbye
Chapter 181: This Was Goodbye
Ariana’s POV
The hospital room felt different today, lighter, if I may add, almost like the world wasn’t about to end tomorrow.
Asher was sitting on the bed beside me with his hand in mine, and his eyes were on my face. He wasn’t angry anymore.
The coldness was gone.
The distance was gone.
The wall he had built between us had finally crumbled. It’s like being taken away from us made him realize how much he needed me, and vice versa.
He told me about everything I had missed over the months that I wasn’t with them.
About his kidnap, too... he didn’t deserve that.
"I’m sorry," he had said with tears in his eyes. "I’m sorry I was so angry, I’m sorry I pushed you away, mummy."
Sorry seems to be his new favorite word.
I had pulled him into my arms.
I had held him tight. "You have nothing to be sorry for, I already told you that... everything else doesn’t matter now that you’re here."
Alan was on the other side of the bed. He was quieter and more reserved. He was still getting used to me.
Still learning to trust me.
Still figuring out what it meant to have a mother, but he was here.
The twins were at their ballet practice
Leo wanted to go with them.
The door opened.
Dante walked in.
Marcus was behind him.
Their faces were tired.
Worried.
Dante walked to the bed and kissed my forehead. He kissed Asher’s head and ruffled Alan’s hair. "How are you feeling?" he asked, his voice soft. Gentle.
"I’m okay," I said. "Better now that you’re here."
Marcus looked at the boys. "Come on," he said. "Let’s go get some food. Give your parents some time alone."
Asher kissed my cheek. "I love you, Mom."
Alan hugged me.
They walked out with Marcus.
The door closed behind them. The room was quiet again.
Just me and Dante.
Just the man I loved and the woman who was about to leave him.
Dante sat on the edge of the bed, taking my hand... he looked at me, his eyes were full of love.
"The surgery is tomorrow," he said. It wasn’t a question.
I nodded. "Tomorrow morning. Early."
He squeezed my hand. "I’m scared, Ariana. I’m so scared. I almost lost you once. I can’t lose you again. I won’t survive it."
I felt the tears come I blinked them back. "You’ll survive. You’re stronger than this ."
Dante shook his head. "Not without you. I can’t survive without you... You’re my heart, soul. You’re my everything. Without you, I’m nothing."
I reached up, touching his face.
His stubble was rough against my palm.
"I love you, Dante," I said. "I love you more than words can say... more than actions can show or time can prove. I love you, and I need you to know that no matter what happens tomorrow, whether I make it out alive or not, I love you and I have always loved you and I will always love you."
Dante leaned forward and pressed his forehead against mine. "I love you too, please stop saying things like this, you’re scaring me."
We stayed like that for a moment.
Just breathing together.
Just being together.
"Dante," I said. My voice was quiet. "If I don’t make it—"
Dante pulled back his face, which was hard and looked displeased. "Don’t talk like that or even think like that... You’re going to be fine, the surgery is going to be fine, and we’re going to have a long, happy life together."
"Dante—"
"No." He put his finger on my lips. "No. I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to think about it. I don’t want to imagine a world without you because that world doesn’t exist, not for me."
I smiled.
A sad smile.
A knowing smile. "Okay. I won’t talk about it, but then still promise me that no matter what happens, you’ll take care of our children. You’ll keep them safe, and you’ll keep them happy. You’ll keep them loved."
Dante nodded. "I promise I promise I’ll take care of them, well take care of them..."
"And promise me you’ll take care of yourself too before I fully recover and come home to you."
Dante’s eyes filled with tears. "I promise my love, you just recover fast... okay?"
I molded with a laugh... "I will"
I pulled him closer and kissed him. He didn’t hesitate to kiss me back; his hands were in my hair.
We stayed like that for a long time before pulling apart and gasping for air.
"I love you, Ariana," Dante whispered.
"I love you too, Dante," I whispered back.
But in my heart, I knew.
This was the last time.
The last kiss.
Tomorrow, I will be gone.
But right now, in this moment, I let myself pretend. I let myself believe that everything would be okay.
That the surgery would be a success.
That we would grow old together, and we would watch our children grow up.
I closed my eyes and breathed him in.
I memorized everything.
The way his hand felt in mine.
The way his heart beat against my chest.
The way his lips felt on my skin.
This was goodbye.
My silent, secret, heartbreaking goodbye.
And Dante didn’t even know it.
novel-books